In this time of long winter nights, let us turn in devotion to the Uncreated Light, which even as the shadows of life deepen for us, abides unchanged – Source of Life.
“And the Word was made flesh,
and dwelt among us.” John 1:14
As we engage a spiritual practice, such as the Prayer of the Lamb, and continue faithful in daily practice, we can observe over time various changes that seem to develop or flow naturally. By naturally we mean developing without conscious effort or intentional intellectual work on our part. With the Prayer of the Lamb, we may notice such changes as the ease in praying the Prayer or its evolution in form, or our posture (where and how) for the sitting practice in relationship to the flow of the Prayer, or discovery of new places in various daily activities that lend themselves well to the practice so that the Prayer seems to self-generate. We may also notice changes within ourselves, such as everything from dissipation of the effects of stress to whole shifts in attitude and ways of interacting with others as well as areas previously identified as problems seemingly resolving themselves or ceasing to be problems. As practice matures or ripens, we might expect fruit to be produced, fruit that is practical and useful, like figs on a tree that are meant to be plucked and eaten or made into Christmas pudding.
Let me share with you what I have been observing and learning in my own practice of the Prayer of the Lamb. I began with a sincere motivation of devotion to Yeshua. It was mixed with other motivations, to be sure, but devotion as a deep yearning of the heart was clearly highly important to me. This devotion has characterized my motivation for this whole practice, a way to express my gratitude and love for our Lord. Secondly I engaged this prayer as a spiritual practice that assists release of self-identification with the ego and mind-body energies towards union with Yeshua. The discovery is that as the second is realized, there is a shift in the first. There is a move from yearning for Jesus, the drawing of the heart, that deep desire, now moving toward absorption of the known self, self-forgetfulness in service, and an encompassing sense of wonder, acceptance, peace, calmness, and love that flows in an outward direction. There was also the discovery that I could no longer feel alone, no sense of loneliness left. Rather loneliness was an impossibility, not even comprehendible. And fear of differences in others, that which can separate us in relationships, dissipated.
But most of all has come a matter-of-fact trust in the healing and integrating process of meditation, even when there is no indication in the actual practice at the moment that I have “gotten any better” in how I meditate should I want to make an evaluation of my practice. It does not matter one fig how I may judge any particular time of sitting in silence with the Prayer. Consistency and regularity in practice, showing up and attending without judgment are all that it takes. For I am convinced through personal experience that the work of integration, healing and transformation is not mine but of the Resurrection Spirit of Yeshua.
The shift in devotion was the most startling when I recognized that it had already happened. I wondered if it could possibly be that devotion directed toward Yeshua could ever change. How I was experiencing that devotion and expressing that devotion however did change. The devotion became somehow reconfigured on its own, now directed toward others in service. I had been quite happy when on sabbatical pouring out the hours each day in meditation with the flow of heart energy intentionally and freely and joyfully given to Jesus. Then the call came to share the Prayer of the Lamb with others, and before I realized it, the Spirit seemed to have evicted me out of the sabbatical and into active service. Now in the arena of this service configured both with the Community of the Lamb ministry and in parish ministry, the service has been freshly experienced as acts of devotion with the same heart energy flowing spontaneously and freely in the relationships of service. Others suddenly appear before me as reflections of divine creativity and revelations of Yeshua, Yeshua being present standing between us, or we being together in him. Now it is "agape" love, that love which expresses the love between the Lover and the Beloved, love that is the medium in which all relationships swim, and is truth and reality check. And consciousness expands, a consciousness which is being wide awake to the present moment and which transcends intellect and articulation.
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