Testimony

There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment and he who fears is not perfected in love.
1 John 4:18

I think I was born with fear and joy in my heart and developed both in the womb. My mother’s expectations for me were always beyond what was normal all through my life from the moment of conception on. Fear was always competing with joy. My father loved me without expectations, loved me as I was. He and I were very close and when he died suddenly when I was 15 years old the fear of abandonment held me in its grip for many years, and any loss in my life was magnified. I have had a lot of healing prayer for this, and then I began to pray the Prayer of the Lamb in 2001. Through that prayer prayed daily on a regular basis the Lord began a deeper healing and without realizing it I was being set free of that inner enemy, fear.

I realized in 2006 that the fear of abandonment was gone. I knew it was gone when my husband was diagnosed with dementia. I knew the day would come when he would be “leaving me,” an ongoing thing, but I wasn’t afraid of losing him. The loss would be tragic, but the fear of it was gone. I also realized this summer of 2008 that other fears were gone as well – fear of financial loss, fear of the dentist, fear of pain, and numerous other fears. God’s perfect love has cast out fear, and I’m able to love more deeply, see people and situations with Christ’s eyes and be more compassionate with others. I also have more energy, as fear was a heavy weight that I was carrying.

It is so freeing to be rid of fear and I am so grateful to the Lord for this miracle in my life. Now the joy of the Lord is my strength.

Jane Gray York