The Ashes of Our Mortality

 What a particular moment in time for the beginning of this season of Lent!

We are emerging from the shadow of two years of pandemic

            having lost loved ones, 

            having been separated from each other,

            seeing many elements of what was once dependable in our culture 

                        now unstable or failing us, 

                        unreliable for seeing us through the future

                                    and whatever that might bring 

                                                given the changes in climate 

that are also taking from us what we have loved and relied upon in the past.

 

It is a time of grief.

 

So these words from the Prophet Joel came to me:

“Yet even now, says the Lord, return to me with all your heart,

            with fasting, with weeping, and with mourning;

rend your hearts and not your clothing.”

 

This describes the heart being pulled to the point of being torn,

            revealing an atmosphere of grief and mourning.

 

The global scale of grief is apparent in the war going on in Ukraine,

            and the flight of refugees, not just from there,

                        but from Afghanistan, South America, and elsewhere.

 

Now, there are no soldiers of ours being killed in battle,

            but how countless are the victims of war, any war, 

                                    and of violence both far away and close at hand, here too.

 

Grief is the rending of the heart.

 

Grief, you may be surprised, actually serves a beneficial purpose.

            The deaths of those dear to us, 

            or the deaths young people dying before their time,

            or the deaths of women and children and the old and infirm 

                        by the violence of warfare or crime

pokes us sharply enough to remind us that we too will die.

 

In this we are somberly made aware of the fact of our own mortality.

            We won’t get out of this alive.

 

Am I being morbid?  all this reference to death.

            I don’t intend for these remarks to sound morbid.

            They are intended as a reality check,

                        a healthy way to stimulate us to look at where we are going.

Folks, it’s a race to the grave for us all.

 

For some of us, that grave is no longer off in the distance;

            it’s looming on the horizon.

 

Maybe it’s just me. 

My recent announcement of “retirement” is one of those life transition points.

            My innards have been communicating to me 

                                    “You are old, and getting older and starting to wear out.” 

            They tell me I am past my prime.

 

The warranty has run out on some of the parts.

The sag in the skin is here to stay.

The ache in the elbow when the barometer changes,

            a process of disintegration is in slow progress,

                        a gradual gift from God to help us disengage 

            from holding on too tightly to life here in this plane of existence.

 

Our mortality is the back story, the reason for this liturgy today.

Ashes, the burnt palms from the Palm Sundays of past years,

            are marked in the sign of the cross on our forehead in the same place

            where the oil of chrism marked the sign of the cross at our baptisms.

 

The sign of the cross, this time with different words than we heard at baptism:

This time:            “Remember that you are dust, and to dust you shall return.”

 

It is good for us to be here today, to begin another Lent 

                        with holy fasting, with self-reflection and with ashes,

            the ashes of our mortality, what is left behind of the desiccated body

                                    shrunk down to an urn that we put in a niche

                                                on the other side of that wall.

 

These are not the ashes associated with public displays of fasting 

            that the Gospel for today speaks of.

These are the ashes of grief over our mortal condition.

 

The words spoken by Jesus in the Sermon on the Mount

            warn us to be carefully self-reflective about 

                        our motivations behind our public acts of worship.

Do we secretly want to have people think of us 

            as good, morally upright people, 

            not self-righteous, but exhibiting signs of repentance?

Really?  Is that why we wear these ashes on our faces?

                                    for what other people will think

What sort of a temporary status does that give you?

            It is seen by few 

            and lasts for much less time than it takes 

                        to update your status on Facebook,

                        where your “friends” can hit the like button.

 

No, these are the ashes of what we will look like after death.

This is tremendously important for us to get about Ash Wednesday

            as we begin another Lent.

We start with death, our common human condition,

            and walk with it 40 days to the cross,

                        where another Death 

            brings the end of death’s reign of terror over all humankind.

                                    Ultimate Gospel Good News.

 

Forty days we set aside for intentional spiritual work

            of fasting, prayer and reflection on scripture and on our lives.

                        both of these – reflection on scripture AND our lives.

 

Death looming on the horizon is a great spiritual gift

            for awakening us to question the meaning of our lives,

                        the course and direction of our lives,

                        the goal of our lives,

                        the value of our lives.

 

Once someone related to me 

            the conversations she had had with two different neighbors.

Both of them did not profess any religious affiliation, did not go to church,

            had left that long ago.

Yet both independently had expressed the same need for Lent!

They thought Lent was a good idea, helpful,

            for having a designated space of time devoted to personal reflection.

 

If those outside the Church see the value of Lent 

                        (whether they observe it or not),

            then don’t ignore or devalue 

                                                what Lent has to offer us sitting here in church!

 

Let me come back to those words I quoted from the Prophet Joel,

            excellent words for personal reflection

            

“Yet even now, says the Lord, return to me with all your heart,

                        with fasting, with weeping, and with mourning;

            rend your hearts and not your clothing.

Return to the Lord, your God,

            for he is gracious and merciful, 

                        slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love…”

 

Rend your hearts and not your clothing, 

            not just the outer layer of your self identity 

                                    depicted through your wardrobe choices.

Rend your hearts.

Let them be torn open.

Let Jesus’ holy Spirit, like a gentle hurricane, shred what cloaks your heart.

 

When Jesus died, Matthew’s Gospel tells us, 

            the curtain in the Temple that covered the Holy of Holies,

                                    which was the heart center of Jewish worship,

            that curtain was torn in two, top to bottom,

and the heart was exposed, the center of being.

 

In that dramatic action, we can see the effect and the power,

            the efficacy of Christ’s death for us

that tears its way through all the veils to the place

                        where our deepest desires and loves and hurts and hopes reside.

 

His death brings liberating life for us.

 

So we no longer need fear the disintegration of our mortal bodies,

            for God’s love expressed through Jesus is gracious and merciful, 

                        slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love.

 

Our work this Lent is to give up and let our hearts be rent open

            to this Love.

 

May this be a blessed and happy Lent for each of you

            so that we may prepare with joy for the Paschal feast.

Uncreated Light

 We can tell it is the end of the Epiphany season

            not just by this Wednesday being Ash Wednesday

                        but that today’s gospel is the Transfiguration.

Ending the Epiphany Season with the Transfiguration 

            is ultimate manifestation, or Epiphany, of Light to the World.

This is Uncreated Light from the Source, the Greek word arch,

            translated in the Prologue of John as the beginning,

            the beginning point or source point of all that is,

                        creation for the Uncreated Light.

 

Before we can talk of the Transfiguration, however,

            we must look first at this story of Moses.

 

Moses comes down from Mount Sinai with the Law of the Covenant

            on two tablets of stone, the revelation of God’s will,

and the face of Moses is ablaze with the reflected Shekinah Glory of God,

                        Moses having been in God’s presence for 40 days and 40 nights.

 

What would you think, how would you react to

            someone coming to you with a message from God

            whose face was emitting a bright light?

 

Weird, freaky, unnerving, frightening…

 

It just might be a little too close for comfort 

            to be around someone on such a close personal basis with God.

 

Yu can imagine the Israelites saying in response:

“Let’s just focus on the Law written on those stone tablets,

            give us something we can do,

and put a veil over that shine, 

            so we don’t have to look at what happens to a person 

                                                                                    in intimate relationship with God.”

 

Does this describe our spiritual condition?

Let me read to you a quotation from something my spiritual director wrote

            about the human condition 

                        in relationship to this encounter with God’s presence.

 

“Give us the Law, give us the rules, give us the traditions, 

give us the structure of authority, …

give us the way of righteousness 

            so we can know we are in and those not of us are out.  

Give us this great, frozen mask of our hearts, 

            our refusal to know our nakedness before God, 

            our continual absorption in issues of will and deed 

                        that we may be distracted from our heart’s condition, 

                        from our fear of pure intimacy, 

                                    our utter openness to great mystery, 

                                                                                    great love, unspeakable power, 

                        from our utter lack of control over love, worth, and death.  

Just tell us what to do.  

Help us ignore that not the merest [veil] separates you and us.”

 

Is this a moment of truth telling? 

Can we be honest enough to admit that there are many times

            when we would put our practice of religion between us and God                                     whose sheer presence is so unnerving?  

that we would put the effort of producing our own righteousness 

                        through the keeping of rules 

               as a buffer between us and the Love of God that is so intensely personal?

 

Okay, now let’s look at the story of the Transfiguration.

Jesus has been praying on a mountain, Mount Tabor,

            There are no stone tablets this time.

Instead it is Jesus himself who is the revelation of God’s will.

            And it’s not just his face shining, but his whole body.

No amount of clothing will veil this radiance, this Shekinah Glory of God.

 

And what is this?  Moses and Elijah are with him.

            Aren’t they supposed to be long departed from this world?

There is something of Resurrection about all this.

 

And Moses and Elijah and Jesus are deep in discussion,

            about what? about the upcoming events in Jerusalem – his death.

 

Peter, James and John haven’t been praying;

They had been trying to stay awake

            while Jesus was pulling another all-nighter in prayer.

Their level of consciousness might be questioned.

 

            So when they are jarred back to consciousness 

by this revelation of radiant being and the presence of Moses and Elijah,

                        Peter starts babbling.

What Peter proposes is less about Jesus and Moses and Elijah

            and more about Peter, James and John,

            about building three little hermitages 

                        where they can sit and contemplate 

                                                this colossal spiritual experience of radiance,

                                                this “mountaintop experience.”

They want to institutionalize it, encase it, hold it, 

            have some way to control it, keep it from going any further.

It’s  not the radiant revelation they want to preserve – – but their experience of it.

 

And so the Cloud comes over all the scene.

 

Where have we heard of a cloud before in Bible stories?

The cloud that led them in the desert, 

            that came over the Tent of Meeting,

            that descended on the Temple, such as in Isaiah, chapter 6.

The Cloud of God’s Presence.

 

And from the Cloud comes the voice:  “This is my Son…listen to him!”

 

                        Shut up, Peter.  Wake up and listen to Jesus.

 

I have stood on the Mount of the Transfiguration, Mt. Tabor.

 

They have built Peter’s three tabernacles there,

            Chapels for Moses and Elijah and the central domed church.

 

Isn’t that just the way!

Turn the revelation into a building, a structure,

            rather than see it immediately present in close proximity

                                    to ourselves personally.

 

In the Eastern Orthodox Church at least 

            there is a fascination with this Transfiguration event,

                        this Uncreated Light that shines through the whole body of Jesus,

                        this Light from the Source referenced in the Prologue of John’s Gospel.

 

There is the realization that this radiance of Uncreated Light 

            is the NORMATIVE state for Jesus,

                        not something he took on at that particular time

                                    to dazzle the eyes of Peter, James and John.

The Eastern Orthodox say that rather at this time

            the eyes of the disciples were released to be able to see

                        what has always been there, the Truth of what Jesus is like.

Jesus opened the spiritual eyes of his disciples

                        so that they could see the Uncreated Light,

                                    that same Light reflected in Moses’ face,

                        the Uncreated Light in him, in Jesus, the Word incarnate,

                                    the Word that is Light coming into the world.

 

The implications of this are enormous,

            because of the Resurrection,

for in Resurrection Jesus fulfills his promise to always be with us,

                        even to the completion of the age.

 

There is nowhere that is not full of the Resurrection Presence of Jesus,

            and specifically this is said of the Church, his Body.

 

Here’s the connection between ourselves and the Transfiguration,

            this shining revelation of God’s Glory Presence,

and there is no way to keep a distance from it,

                        except in our own ignorance, denial and avoidance,

            which, unfortunately, we are quite adept at doing.

 

There is a story from a collection of the Sayings of the Desert Fathers and Mothers,

            those mainly from the 4^th Century on 

                        who went out into the desert places of Egypt

                        fleeing the ease of life in the cities 

that was having such a corrupting influence on the Church.

They went out into the desert seeking to follow their Lord more purely.

 

The story goes that Abba Lot went to see Abba Joseph and said to him,

            “Abba, as far as I can I say my little office, I fast a little,

            I pray and meditate, I live in peace

            and as far as I can, I purify my thoughts.

            What else can I do?”

Then the old man stood up and stretched his hands towards heaven.

His fingers became like ten lamps of fire 

            and he said to him,

            “If you will, you can become all flame.”

 

The Radiance of God is all around us all the time,

            but we don’t see it.

And we need to see this 

            in order for our ministry to one another and the world outside our door                                     to become even more effective.

 

St. Theophan the Recluse, one of the great saints of the Eastern Church, wrote:

            “As God is Light, so also our spirit is light.

            Having been breathed into us by God,

            it seeks God, knows God, and in [God] alone finds rest.”

 

Now when we celebrate the Eucharist,

when we partake of the Body and Blood of Jesus

            we receive into ourselves his Life energy.

 

How many years have you been coming here Sunday by Sunday

            consuming the Body and Blood of Jesus?

You are shot through with this same Light 

                        as the disciples saw in the Transfigured Jesus.

 

May the Church awake to this great truth of being,

and may we be delivered from our fears about coming into 

                        the brilliant Presence of this Love,

            so that we may serve faithfully with the gifts entrusted to us.